Change
by Celestial Eight
Summary: Pidge knew he held himself responsible for a lot of things in all this and a certainty that had eluded her so far opened in her. This quest had just been as much Shiro's as it has been hers. / In the three years of their journey, changes have become a constant. While Pidge still struggles to adapt to some, the gears of fate shift once more. [Shidge, aged up]


To all my followers I gained through my MLB stories: Hello, it's me again, and I'm sorry this isn't what you hoped for. I'll explain myself in a tick.

To all first-timers in regards of my stories: Happy to see you here and I hope you enjoy your stay.

So, where do I start? I know I haven't updated anything on this page for an awful long time, but shortly after my last update, I was on the verge of a burn-out job-wise. While I managed to pedal back last minute, I'm suffering from the after-effects even now. My concentration is still nowhere where it should be and scatters so damn easily. I'm amazed my wonderful beta Ju didn't come at me screaming while correcting this piece bc I sure made a whole lot mistakes. Writing in general has been impossibly hard for me the last year – and still somewhat is. But when you have written stories for your whole life, you simply don't stop like that. And when you're stuck deep in Voltron Hell and try to cope with the fact that S2 is going to air in about two weeks… you have sort of an aggressive writing fit around New Year's and cope by exploiting that idea you had back last October. Yeah. I also meant to post this piece pre-S2, but as always, the thing blew WAAAYYY out of proportion. (So, yes, in this story, S2 never happened.) I also meant to post this as Two-Shot, with a second part named 'Stasis' from Shiro's PoV, but since 'Change' works pretty well as stand-alone, I'll leave it a One-Shot for now. I would rather concentrate on updating my MLB stories first – and write that Klancelot piece before S3 destroys my HCs. Same goes for the Zarfor one (…don't ask, I'm still not sure myself how I fell into THAT hell).

But since you came here for Shidge, Shidge you shall receive now. Because everyone needs a 'problematic' ship in a while. LOL. No, seriously, I'm tired of all this discourse – and too old for all that Age Gap Drama. Since the official sources still speak of 'five teenagers', I'm hc-ing Shiro smth 19-ish (close to 20) and Pidge 15-something in the series. That said, I believe I rambled long enough. Have fun!

* * *

Time brought change.

It was a rule that seemed to be engraved in the matter of the universe itself.

But even so Pidge sometimes struggled to grasp just how much had changed over the course of these three, short years.

Changing the cosmos for the better, little by little, winning it back from Zarkon's grasp, planet by planet, they had all changed, too. Richer with countless experiences, good and bad, that had etched themselves into the consciousness of the small team, they had grown more mature and aware of the task that meant to protect the vast expanse of different life-forms throughout the cosmos - becoming the responsible Paladins Allura probably had always seen in them.

Yet this wasn't the only thing…

"Pidge?" At the sound of her chosen name her head jolted from the laptop, heart beating a little faster than it should have. Eyes flickering to the sheen of light that fell into the otherwise dark room, the paladin of the Green Lion could make out a tall silhouette.

Shiro.

"Sorry if I disturbed you. How are things going?"

Pidge tried to ignore the strange rush the ring of his voice left in her chest and bent her neck back a little, tufts of fawn hair tamed into the smallest of ponytails brushing her skin

"They get smarter," she replied with a glance on the Galran code before her, lips slightly pursed, before a smug grin curled around the corners of her mouth. "But not as smart as me."

"That's a relief." There was an audible lift of tension from Shiro's voice. Although the team always joked about how their leader's hair got even greyer with each passing day (thanks to them); Pidge knew Shiro was shouldering far more than he actually let on. Sometimes she just wanted to…

"Don't overwork yourself, okay?"

"Don't worry, I'll just finish this one off and then go to bed," she replied, easing her tense back as she stretched her arms above her head. 'Same goes for you,' her eyes added silently as they fell back on Shiro whose shoulders dropped in defeat. When he turned his head, the light from the hallway revealed his smile. There was another strum on her heartstrings, the echo reverberating even stronger in her chest this time. "Good night," he said softly. "Sleep well," she muttered and with a last nod, the Black Paladin closed the door.

Pidge's eyes returned to the screen, the reddish glow of the enemy code the only source of illumination again. Although the Green Paladin couldn't say for certain that the scarlet glow on her cheeks was a byproduct of the Galran interface alone.

Heaving a sound of heavy frustration, she let herself fall back on the tangle of bedding, legs still crisscrossed and with one arm coming to rest above her forehead.

She was too smart to not know what the source of this giddiness was that floated through her stomach like a storm of butterflies whenever Shiro was around. She knew why the smile of their leader did not only let her feel accomplishment but also a strange kind of weightlessness that made it hard to focus.

She knew full well and yet her sharp mind had never left her so clueless about what to do about it.

Her gaze shifted from the reddish ceiling into the dark of the room.

As hard as Pidge tried, she just couldn't pin the point in time when THAT change had happened. When her view on Shiro had started to shift ever so slightly.

He was the closest thing to family she had light-years away from home and had admired him even before – god, Matt had known little else when he had talked about work. Although this small hero worship she had kindled for years had been tested initially after Shiro had returned to earth without her father and brother, it had evolved into a deep friendship lastly when fate had decided to set them onto this grand space adventure. The mutual bonds of trust and understanding they shared were her anchor, her constant in all this. Shiro was always there, acting like a big brother and father at once... and yet...

The Paladin of the Green Lion came up with an agitated groan, staring at the code before her madly like it was the source of all her frustration and she could burn it away with the intensity of her gaze. Hands came up to ruffle the mess of her fawn locks before her whole form hunched with the suffocating feeling of defeat.

Why now and why him? She didn't have time or place for that kind of emotions. She needed to stay focused. Half of her family was still somewhere out there and Zarkon still ruled more than half of the universe. Probably even more. She just couldn't allow herself to be distracted, her resolve to waver.

Even if it was Shiro. Even if...

She shook her head, amber eyes coming to rest on the delicate fingers on her lap. Even when she tried to deny it and even if her slender silhouette appeared still quite androgynous, there were unmistakable signs that her body was maturing one of a woman. Her hips had become broader, her lips fuller, voice softer and even the wide shirt couldn't fully hide the rounded shape of her chest.

While their little crew had taken note on the changes themselves, they never had been an issue or reason to treat her differently (except maybe for Allura, who she suspected to eagerly await the moment Pidge would fit into the princess' old dresses). But the Green Paladin sometimes wondered if adolescence had changed her.

It was easy to lose track and sense of time if you drifted through a vast ocean of stars that knew no day or night, hours of fighting and training blending into each other and the cycle of sleep and wakefulness was only determined by the ship's artificial lights.

Yet it still passed mercilessly and had left Pidge with this body that still felt somehow foreign and a heavy dose of hormones that made her want to act like the love-struck teenager she couldn't allow herself to be.

"LAAAAAAANCEEE!"

Pidge started at Keith's voice that boomed through the corridor and cut through her thoughts like a sword. A set of footsteps pounded by, followed quickly by another one before this part of the ship fell silent again.

She breathed heavily and then grimaced at the screen before her.

She was thinking too hard and too long about it, losing precious time. Nothing would come out of mulling over the twist of her own emotions when her prime objective was to decipher this code before her. She better got to work now if she hoped on catching even the faintest sliver of sleep.

·

Pidge had barely slept at all after cracking the riddled Galran signature, excitement coursing through her in crashing waves and leaving her drunk on exhilaration. It had been hard to not run to the bridge and summon everyone at once; knowing they all would need a wake mind for this.

She had gone over the piece of information countless times until then, her heart pounding wildly at the line of symbols that the enemy forces used to describe humans. Earthlings like them, to be exact. And it spoke of two, escaping a mining colony. It was almost too good to be true

"Can we say for sure it's not just another trap?"

Keith's objecting voice pulled her back to the conversation at hand and the Paladin of the Green Lion understood full well where he came from.

Ever since Zarkon's forces had grown aware that there was someone who could crack their codes, they not only had altered their scripting, but also would add hoaxes to the flow of information to lure the paladins into perilous situations. Her gaze shifted to Shiro for a second and there was this cold, iron grip around her chest that made it hard to breathe whenever she thought back to the first of those ambushes. Shiro had been in the center of battle and closer to death than life when the rest of them had been able to push back the overwhelming forces. It had been restless days and worrisome nights in front of the crypod until their leader had recovered at last. Pidge had worked relentlessly after that to filter out the deathly lures and at last felt like it amounted in some kind of success.

"...no, but it's unlikely," she said firmly

"How come?" Lance asked.

A victorious, smug grin edged on Pidge's mouth.

"I'm glad you asked. You know, while the Galran computers don't exactly work like the ones on earth, I found a sort of timestamp within code."

Curiosity spread across her friends' faces and she reminded herself to keep it simple.

"What all false information they spread has in common is that it was added afterwards. Probably to make it easier for the soldiers to filter it out again later," she mused. "I went through the whole message several times and found nothing of that sort. No alteration. The information is genuine," she could hardly ban the giddy joy in her voice when she confirmed the fact once more.

"But we don't know if this is just a new way to set us up," Hunk objected cautiously and although Pidge saw the reason in his argument, she felt panic rise and clench her stomach. "Don't you understand? Matt and father could be..."

She felt Shiro's hand come to rest on her shoulder, and as she looked up to the young man that still towered her with more than a head's length, she found a soft smile gracing his lips. And above it, a faint, silent hope in his argent irides. "We all do, Pidge. We will go on this mission, but we will be careful. Please tell us what you have."

She angled her gaze at the other Paladins. Lance gave her a thumbs up and remembering their countless conversations about family and his strong longing for home, a warm feeling unraveled within her heart. Of course he would be with her. But there also were approving nods from Keith's and Hunk's side, although a slight frown remained on the former one's forehead. Ever the skeptic, she thought. Yet always the first one to charge in when danger was at their feet.

"Okay," she nodded and then turned. "Allura? Would you please call up the star map?"

"Just a tick, dear."

In front and all around them, the universe came to life, ever-changing constellations of unbound blue and the scarlet glow of Zarkon's red. It had faded since they first laid eyes on that magitec planetarium, but it was still strong. And then there was a black, cold mass in between where enemy leader had extracted the very life-force of the planets. And this was where they wanted to go.

"Coran? Set the coordinates to RA 18.5ticks, 56debushes, 10vagas, declination +07° 00′ 52″, 13.54 mag – reference point Zarkon's base."

Illuminated by the ethereal shine around them, the cold remnants of a solar system sprung into view. A cloud of asteroids spun around them like a rocky cocoon while many small planets drifted slowly in the gravity of a brown dwarf.

"That's quite vast," Hunk commented.

"It's genius," Pidge replied, feeling pride in both her brother and father. The magnetic property of the asteroid belt would distort every frequency, making a perfect route for an escape and the rich number of planets was a safe hideout from pursuing enemy troupes.

"And how are we supposed to find them in that ...rocky mess? Man, that's sure a dozen or more planets out there." Hunk scratched his head, probably calculating how many meals he would miss when they combed the area. Ever since he had toned up a bit, the dark void in his stomach had grown even more enormous and for all the changes time had brought to them – some things probably would always stay the same, the Paladin of the Green Lion concluded.

Pidge shook her head in reply to her companion's doubts.

"They wouldn't just fly in blindly," she stated, recalling the contents of the message. The burning rage to be outsmarted by two mere human slaves had been almost tangible in every line. The shameful admission how they had conjured an operable space ship from an discarded transportation pod and scraps from the mines had been short, but was enough to tell the Green Paladin that their plan must have grown over months and not without careful planning.

A swift glance to Shiro revealed that he was thinking the same and meeting her gaze, he wordlessly urged her to go on.

"The area might be dead, but there are still some planets which are more habitable than others. And from those, there is only a handful which are passed by trading ships occasionally." Pidge looked at the dull spheres drifting through weightlessness. It nagged her that they still hadn't found a way to stop Zarkon from extracting the planets' quintessence. "Before Zarkon took hold of this area, it used to be a highly frequented, intergalactic market. Some of the merchants still take this old route, because – despite Galra controls – it's relatively safe."

"And you say your family waits on one of those planets for a ship to pick them up?" Keith inquired.

It was the best she could hope for. But she couldn't waver or be uncertain now.

"Yes," she said strongly, painting her fear with the color of conviction.

"Well then, what are we waiting for?" Allura declared. "Get into your seats, Paladins, we have a family to reunite."

·

It was always disheartening to see what Zarkon's dark power could do to a previously blooming solar system. Planets that once had inherited advanced societies fell dark and dull; lively, fertile planes turned into dry wastelands and knowledge accumulated over the ages scattered and became ultimately lost.

It was no different this time with the dim, celestial spheres that hung around the brown dwarf like a string of dirty marbles – testament to their enemy's increasingly more aggressive conquest.

"If you asked me… this isn't exactly the place I would have chosen to hide from Zarkon's soldiers," Pidge heard Lance's voice transmit to her Lion. They had each taken on a different sector with potential planets to cover a wider area, while Allura and Coran had stayed on the ship to keep watch on potential enemies.

"But nobody asked you, so keep your comments about girls and beaches to yourself," Keith muttered.

"Hey, why would you know I was going to say something about girls and beaches?"

"You always do," Hunk commented under his breath.

"Guys, focus. We have a mission," Shiro's voice cut in.

"I'm always focused," Lance declared and there was a moment of correlative, resigned silence in the static. Despite her taut nerves, Pidge had to smile while she listened to their bicker.

Although she sometimes struggled to show it – human emotions, after all, were far beyond the realm of 0s and 1s where she felt at home – the Green Paladin was thankful for her friends.

Back on Earth, when there had been nobody she could trust and she had been pent-up in her thoughts all alone, the task of finding her father and brother had appeared unfathomable immense at times. There had been days when she would feel drained from working relentlessly, diving into newfound data for the length of a night just to come out with naught and nothing the next morning. She had carried on nonetheless, never losing sight of that one desire, but it hadn't been easy. Not that it was easy now. However, three years ago Pidge never would have guessed the value of comfort that derived from the simple knowledge that someone had your back.

"Is everything okay, Pidge?"Shiro inquired anxiously and Pidge wasn't sure how long she had zoned out.

"Yeah. Just… let me know if you find something," she replied and pulled her awareness back into the cockpit.

"Copy that," four voices saluted and Pidge directed her Lion to the next planet. She had drawn total blanks at the two previous ones, but she wasn't ready to give up just yet. She wasn't also entirely sure what exactly she was looking for, but had all her channels set to filter out any kind of distress beacon one could send. Or any other kind of broadcast that reached up from the desolate structures below.

It was a subtle, risky endeavor not to be found by the Galran patrols that Pidge knew would pass by here occasionally and simultaneously send signals to the trading fleets that took this route. If anyone could do this, it was Matt. She could say this with solid conviction and still missed the times when they had been kids and all she had to do was setting her makeshift transmitter to a certain frequency to cross the distance of one floor. It had been like a secret code between the siblings, a knowledge only they shared. In a nostalgic rush she called up the USW controls and entered the numbers she remembered by heart. Just looking at the white characters on the blue sent a soothing surge through her veins and the clicking sound that… that…– her brow furrowed – the clicking sound that shouldn't be there, because there wasn't supposed to be anything on this channel to begin with. She stirred from her seat, leaning far towards the viewing panel in front of her, eyes affixed on the planet below.

"I… I think I found something," she uttered breathlessly and it was only at the sound of her own voice speaking the impossible truth that the rigor inside her started to break apart and give leeway to a crashing wave of emotions. Her head swam at the sudden influx of too many thoughts, of adrenaline and endorphins, and the intensity of feeling shook her form as well as the effort to suppress it.

She needed a clear mind, she drilled herself, couldn't allow heady excitement to get the better of her. Analyzing the situation quickly, there was only one choice, one action, one resolve she meant to follow. "I'm going in."

Pidge steered her Lion closer to the planet until she felt the pull of gravity dragging at the giant, mechanical cat.

"Hey, Pidge, wait for us. It's dangerous to go alone."

"We will be there any second. Stay where…."

The gurgle of voices died down as she shut off the communication device. They were all important to her, yes, but nothing would keep her in the sky any longer when the chance to make her world whole again lay right at her feet.

She dashed over the crumbling ruins of a city, towards the mountains that loomed behind. Although she was moving with tremendous speed, distorting the shape of placid, green clouds in her wake, it felt to Pidge as if the air around her had frozen solid and her Lion had to claw through every inch of atmosphere.

Her whole body trembled with tense anticipation as fear mingled with hope inside her chest. She tried to remind herself that there still were a thousand scenarios where the tunnels and caves in the hills would be empty or how this could be a trap after all, but truth was that the deafening echo of her rapid heartbeat drowned out this careful, timid voice almost entirely. The finely tuned cogs of her mind wheeled and shifted to aim to a single direction.

Fingers flew over holographic surfaces in the manner a wizard would weave a spell, setting scanners and increasing performance. Screens toggled under her command as she adjusted the searching device to the composition of the rocky cliffs, allowing the magnetic waves to reach deep below the surface.

She detected several life-forms that defied the forbidding conditions on the drained planet and still called the veins of mountains their home – but nothing that resembled a humanoid species the faintest. A frigid sensation clawed its way from her stomach to her chest and she swallowed hard, yet kept up her pace.

The Green Paladin refused to believe that her logic would fail her so close to the goal.

Her father and brother just had to be here.

Working the keys on the interface before her, she changed more parameters – some minerals in the stone were probably interfering with the signal and warping it in consequence. She ran a new scan of the area.

Please, let them be here, she thought intently while some awfully long seconds passed by as the Lion's computer processed the data.

Finally, the radar's screen crowded with dots anew, each marking a living being and it were more than before. Pidge could tell almost instantly that most of them belonged to feral beasts, but…

Her eyes locked to two glistening sparks close to each other. With a stammering heart and a throat almost too tight for breathing, she zoomed in. Humanoid. There was no mistake in it. These were…

Without a second thought, she dove down.

·

Pidge's steps echoed from the empty galleries, resounding with the fast staccato of her pulse. The blue screen she had summoned over her left arm bumped up and down while she sprinted through the abandoned mine. Serving as source of light and map at the same time in the tunnels that stretched like a maze below the earth, her gaze hardly left it. Even more because she was scared what she would find when she looked ahead. For the very first time in her life she was afraid that her calculations would fail her – or, seen from a mathematical, prosaic point of view, proof perfectly right since the chance that it was her family waiting at the end of this underground road proofed vanishingly low.

As she drew closer to the designated location of her scanners, she slowed her pace, not knowing what precautions the two Galran fugitives had taken against unwelcome intruders.

"Hello?" Pidge called into the darkness beyond the halo of the screen, a little startled how feeble her own voice sounded. "I mean no harm," she continued, working a bit of firmness back into her speech. "I come in peace, as a Paladin and messenger of Voltron."

She waited and stillness closed around her like a thick blanket. Every shallow pull of her lungs rang sharply in her ears and as nervous agitation churned through her veins, she hardly could hear anything else but her own, drumming heartbeat. Instinct told her to charge ahead, to see end to this torture, and the power it took to stem against this primeval yearn left her with an almost physical pang. Seconds passed, a minute then and just as she thought she couldn't bear it anymore, there was the shuffling sound of careful movements. "Voltron…?" someone asked, voice just above a whisper, yet there was some kind if recognition in the word. The hairs on Pidge's skin rose. The voice had been male.

"The Legendary Defender of the Universe and sworn enemy to Zarkon," the Paladin of the Green Lion elaborated mechanically, wondering how she could still sound so strong when her insides felt like they were bound by a tight, winding rope.

A faint murmur arose from the darkness, hushed words of an exchange, and a young man stepped forward into the blue glow.

His features looked shockingly hollow and much older than she remembered. His fawn hair was a wild mess and although his amber eyes missed the usual curious glow and the signatory glasses, she would have recognized him between thousands and millions of people. And right behind him, half hidden by the shadows, stood an elderly man who was nobody else but her father.

Pidge froze. Albeit her mind had played through so many variations of a possible reunion since she had embarked on this journey, they all paled in the face of this moment. In the blinding white of a consciousness that still struggled to compute the image in front of her, she could sense a fierce, positive shock cascading through her utter being. Her limbs felt numb and yet the healing heat that crested in her chest seemed to undo the lines of her body. Vaguely aware that this opposed all scientific knowledge, her soul spilled from all the tiny cracks, washing over the cavern and embracing the figures of her brother and father. The deep chasm that had laid waste to her heart for such a long time closed in a matter of instants and all that remained was a warm, wholesome feeling.

The world fell back into place when Matt moved again. He held himself with the awareness of someone who had lived through more than a human being ever should and the big wrench in his right hand made it painfully obvious that even though she found them, things would never be as they once were.

"How do we know you speak the truth?" he inquired. His narrowed gaze was assessing and his words were intermingled with fear and distrust. A dull, nameless hurt sullied untainted happiness inside her – years under Zarkon's rule had changed her brother's warm, shy smile into a hard line and she dreaded that wasn't the only thing the dark emperor had taken from him. "I…" she started, but then her voice gave out as her throat narrowed and tears welled to her eyes. The more she tried to fight it, the more violent the emotion became and she felt hot wet trickling down her cheeks. She couldn't. She couldn't do this with words.

Hands shaking, Pidge pulled off her helmet so they could see her face.

The tool Matt had meant to use as a weapon slid from his grip and hit the ground with a loud clank.

"...Katie?" he breathed as if an invisible force had knocked all air from his lungs.

A loud, trembling sob parted from Pidge's lips. She broke from her stupor with a few clumsy steps, before she threw herself into a full run.

She struggled to keep her balance when she propelled herself forward, half-supported by jolts from her jet-packs, her own feet not fast enough to carry her into the desired direction. Into the arms of her family.

Pidge collided with the counter-weight of Matt's body where a warm embrace encircled her and then the lank figure of her father rested against her side, pulling both of his children into a tight hug.

She cried against her brother's chest, afraid she would wake from this beautiful dream any moment. She had searched so long. So, so long.

Allowing her emotions to flow unrestraint, the trailing tears stopped eventually and a shaky laughter bubbled up from her throat when perfect bliss bled into her relief. Never had she felt such immense joy. "It's you. It's really you," she whispered like a prayer. The support of their arms, the glow of their presence, and the dusty scent of their clothing all couldn't have been any more real and still it was so hard to grasp.

They stood like that for another lot of minutes until her brother made an effort to bring a little space between them so they could look at each other. A rivulet of damp dust caked on his cheek and it was no different as she looked into her father's features.

Matt's mouth curved into the shadow of a smile as he took in the picture in front of him. "Somehow, you look more like myself than I do," he said, melancholy tinting the edge of his voice, and studying his face, Pidge couldn't help but to think he was right. And not only because she had nearly caught up in height with him. The fine, brown stubble he sported across his chin looked strangely out of place and the shaggy mob of his sandy hair reached past his shoulders. For a second she wondered what he would say to the spectacles she had worn as part of her guise.

She felt her father's hand come to rest on the top of her head.

"How in the world did you even find us, girl? I'm not dreaming, am I?"

"Then we all are," she replied, hardly able to contain another surge of happy tears.

Over the years, she always had pursued that small ray of hope illuminating the path before her and casting back the shadows of uncertainty. Her greatest fright had been that – one day – she would find it swallowed by thundering clouds of truth and herself in rolling, cold darkness. She had been so scared that she had never cared to wonder what it would do to her when she actually succeeded in reaching her goal.

Now her whole world was brimming with warmth and ablaze with light. The cosmos seemed small compared to the grand emotions that sprawled from the dancing stars on her fingertips into the deepest layers of her being. Even the constant threat of Zarkon appeared insignificant. They would beat him eventually.

"Pidge!" Shiro's voice was reflected tenfold by the hollow of the cave and heralded his arrival. In her arms, she felt Matt tense and stir.

Pidge turned slightly so she could angle her gaze at the path she had come from. She had known the others would find her at last – after their first, ill-fated encounter with Zarkon she had modified the Lions' and Paladin suits' tracking ability together with Hunk – but she hadn't expected them so soon. Although she couldn't exactly say how long she had dwelled in the joyous gist of this reunion. The moment had seemed eternal.

Consequently, the sound of his footsteps grew louder and a pivoting, blue light sprung into sight, casting its glow over Shiro's silhouette.

The Paladin of the Black Lion stopped in his tracks as soon as he saw them. Even from here Pidge could recognize the tremor that shook his muscular form and a semblance of understanding flared through her chest. She knew he held himself responsible for a lot of things in all this and a certainty that had eluded her so far opened in her. This quest had just been as much Shiro's as it has been hers.

"Shiro! It's …you, isn't it?" Matt shouted, his voice raw with a tangle of different emotions. "You're alive!"

Her sibling retracted from her arms and Pidge let him, retreating into her father's loose embrace. Her brother's hand twitched momentarily, as if he contemplated to pinch himself, but deciding for the better, he simply started walking towards his old friend who made an attempt to move again, too.

As Matt closed the distance, Pidge couldn't tear her eyes from his right leg which he dragged a little.

Only now she noticed the long, white scar that showed between the tattered remnants of fabric dangling around his thighs. It was easy to imagine the deep gash that the pale line once had been.

Both of the young men stopped only inches away from each other and gazes brushed over each other's appearances, a shadow of guilt equally upon their faces.

Matt shook his head and used his palm to wipe away the damp glimmer in his fawn irides. "I thought I would never see you again." Shiro's eyes shooed away from him for a second and a sad smile cracked his tense countenance.

Then he looked up again and his left hand came to rest on Matt's shoulder. "Hey, I don't die that easily."

Matt blinked and the tense square of his back hunched. "I'm sorry," he said, but his words came in the same breath of Shiro's. The Black Paladin's brow furrowed, but just as he opened his mouth to say something, a tapping noise mixed with a loud jumble of voices. "Shiro! Pidge! Guuuys!"

More footsteps boomed from the walls and the remaining three Paladins pulled into sight, led by Keith.

She could feel her father straighten against her spine and she was sure when she craned her neck, she would find him squinting over her head.

"Katie, do you know these people?" he asked.

"Yes," she replied proudly. "They are my friends."

Pidge looked back, flashing him a bright grin. "And part of our crew."

The gaze he returned was, beneath wonder, also dotted with fatherly love and pride, like he had expected no less from his daughter.

"Seems like we have a lot to talk about."

·

Since their respective chambers would have been a little too small to hold a party of four, they had receded on the oval couch of the Paladins' recreation room. Curiosity had caused the other members of team Voltron to pass by occasionally and Hunk had outdone himself with the meal he had brought a while ago. Yet most of the time, their conversation had flowed undisturbed. For the greater part of the last hours, it had been– besides Shiro – Pidge who had entertained her brother and father with stories of their adventures. Right now, her companion recounted the events of a rescue mission on… on… Pidge eyebrows knit as her mind grappled for the planet's name she was sure Shiro had just mentioned a few moments ago. Her thoughts felt slick like eel and her head a little funny. She blinked hard, trying to shake the sensation.

"I think we should leave it at that for today. Someone seems in desperate need for a bed," Shiro spoke next to her. Alarmed, Pidge straightened. "I-I'm awake." She didn't want to end this just because she was a bit tired. There was still so much to talk about.

"Don't worry, Katie, we will still be here tomorrow," her brother replied, guessing her intention. Then Shiro's hand rested on her shoulder. "He's right. It's been a long day for all of us, let's get some rest."

Both her father and brother nodded in agreement, before the latter picked at the tatters of his shirt. "And I really could use a bath and a change of clothes now."

"And a haircut, son," his father added dryly, and the sudden offense on Matt's face conjured a small bicker from everyone of the small gathering.

"Coran will surely see to all of that," Shiro replied and nodded. "I will take Katie back to her room."

Pidge was about to agree when she belatedly realized that he spoke of her and she reined her weary thoughts back into focus. A flicker of protest flared through her chest. "Don't make it sound like I'm five. I can walk on my own," she protested – although it didn't help to support her claim that she slurred like a drunk.

"You can hardly stand on your own two feet right now," Shiro objected and then his expression grew soft, almost tender. "Let me do this for you, yes?"

Rather abruptly she was wide awake again, a hot rush jolting through her chest and a pleasant heat unfurling in her stomach. She didn't quite trust her voice when she raised it for a reply, but everything else would have left them probably even more concerned. "Alright," she replied and with the admission she felt exhaustion crashing down on her, as if the answer had come at the cost of all her strength.

In truth she hadn't really slept for the remainder of at least two or three days and Shiro's worry was more than justified, she supposed.

The Paladin of the Green Lion swayed a little when she pushed herself from the circular couch in an upright position. Shiro reached for her arm to support her and she turned to her family.

"See you tomorrow," she said and the simple truth of these words still filled her heart with joy.

"Good night," both of them bid her smiling and Pidge was more than sure that it would be one. A good night.

The walk through the spaceship's hallways had rejuvenated Pidge's spirits again and planting each step firmly in front of the other, her gaze turned to her companion walking beside her.

Pidge couldn't remember a time she had seen Shiro that... relieved during their travels. Albeit there were still some dark lines engraved into her companion's face – an unmistakable sign that even now the weight of responsibility wouldn't leave him – he looked at peace with himself. A faint smile danced around his lips and there was a spark in his grey eyes that hadn't been there before. It was almost as if he was glowing in the white, artificial light and...

Pidge realized she had been staring a little too long when Shiro's glance suddenly met hers. Quickly, she averted her eyes, feeling heat rising to her cheeks.

"What is it?" the black paladin asked, mildly confused. Against all embarrassment Pidge couldn't help but to smile. "You look happy."

"I am," Shiro stated. Her smile broadened. "Me too," the brunette agreed, and yet the curl around her lips wavered only seconds later. The day had been a rollercoaster of emotions and now that the events finally started to settle in, there was this grain of anxiety that clung persistently to the folds of her consciousness and just wouldn't leave her. Her amber eyes searched the tiles above them."It's just..."

Pidge fell silent, failing to put her inner conflict into words.

And then Shiro's hand closed around her fingers. His skin was warm against hers and his touch beyond any doubt real. Her glance darted back to him. "I know. But you really did it. You found them."

Pidge sensed his pulse against her palm and how it fell in line with hers. Slowly she shook her head.

"We... we found them", she rephrased his words. If she was ever to blame him for something, then it was for giving himself too little credit. "I couldn't have done this without you. Thank you, Shiro."

There was genuine surprise in her friend's features, but also content, benevolent warmth. Admiration blossomed in her heart and when he squeezed her fingers in a thankful manner, she allowed herself to remain the touch. And for the whole way to her room, Shiro's hand didn't leave hers.

It wasn't long until they arrived at the door to Pidge's chamber and looking at the portal, it felt like ages since she last had been here. So much had happened over the course of a single day.

She turned to Shiro again and at the motion, the Black Paladin cocked his head lightly. There was a bemused twinkle in the argent color of his eyes. "Well, good night then... young lady."

Pidge frowned as her consciousness grazed a memory buried in the dust of oblivion, and a lopsided grin manifested on her features. "You haven't called me that since forever."

"That's true," Shiro admitted, appearing to draw some merriment from the picture he called back to his mind. "Since the day I first met you. You seemed very intent back then to proof that you weren't anything but one."

Pidge pouted. "Hey, what's that supposed to mean?"

"You looked very gracefulat the dinner-table with your face and hands covered in grease and sooth." His indulgent smirk had an unexpectedly infuriating effect on her.

"This was only because the engine I was programming overheated and busted shortly before. I just didn't have the time to clean myself up," she exclaimed sulkily and glowered at him. Which, in return, seemed to have an unexpectedly comical effect on Shiro.

It started with a low, rumbling chuckle from her companion's chest that gradually grew stronger until it rippled through his whole form with a light tremble. As quickly as it had come, the fraction of anger in her dissipated, thinking it impossible to stay mad at him like that, and she joined him with a radiant giggle.

She didn't even know what was so funny about the whole thing because Shiro was actually right in a way and she also didn't understand the urge to defend what had been result of her very nature – but her friend's laugh was just so infecting and honest that she couldn't help it.

They snickered, wheezed and guffawed with unrestrained amusement until her face hurt, their forms shaking and bending as they clutched their bellies to stop themselves from toppling over. There were tears trickling down over the bridge of her nose, yet Pidge wasn't ashamed of them. She just felt so relieved, so happy, so good.

Regaining a bit of composure after a short-breathed hiccup of giggles she raised her amber irides and found Shiro gazing back at her warmly. "You are really something," he said, the echo of a laugh still present in his voice, and ruffled her hair. Pidge allowed herself to lean into the affectionate movement, the corners of her mouth curling into a sheepish smile.

Then his hand came to rest on the top of her head, fingers sinking into the expanse of the fawn hair and she stilled, looking up with an unspoken question on her lips.

He breathed slowly, a decision forming behind grey orbs and the nature of the touch changed, turned into a soft caress that traced down the line to her cheek.

There was a kind of static in the air between them. Pidge neither dared to move forth nor back, her body frozen in a strange state of anticipation.

Shiro's eyes seemed to pull her in as his thumb brushed over delicate skin all so lightly, sending electric, sizzling jolts to race down her nerves.

She felt dizzy drinking in the sight and the feeling, her whole body swaying to the rhythm of her powerful heartbeats.

And suddenly, everything was over. Pidge almost staggered forward when Shiro pulled away, instinctively trying to follow the touch. There was a stinging cold on her cheek where the young man's hand had lain seconds ago.

"I..." Shiro's voice sounded shaken as he seemed to struggle for the right words. "I should go to bed, sorry."

Pidge opened her mouth, but no sound would come out. Words caught in her throat, all she could do was watch Shiro spin on his heel and step out of her reach, unable to follow him. Her own legs were so weak that they might give out any second.

"Good night," he mustered,his tone still aghast with an unknown horror. Then he stormed down the halls, leaving Pidge behind lost in confusing thoughts all alone.

·

Although exhaustion had been dragging heavily at her bones, it had been hard for Pidge to fall asleep. Her mind had been clustered with the pictures of this long day. Vividly, they had stood before her inner eye and had been accompanied by the ghost of the emotions she had felt in those moments.

Turning and tossing until the sweet oblivion of a dreamless sleep had finally descended on her, she had woken up again past noon; and found herself stumbling into the preparations of a 'welcome back'-party in her father's and brother's honor. Although she would have preferred to have a little more private time with her family, the gesture had touched Pidge. Especially since everyone was so genuinely happy for her and worked on their self-assigned task with utmost motivation.

And yet – with a depressed sigh, she let her face sink into the pile of clothing on her bed. It was useless. Everything that she had added to the collection over the past years was practical at its best, but far from being pretty. Nothing suitable for a celebratory occasion. She knew her brother and father would be happy about her presence regardless of what she wore and there was no mandatory dress code, but... who was she trying to lie to?

Pidge turned her head a little, glancing over the sea of fabric. The logic part of her mind could only shake its head at such a folly, elaborate on a whole volume why she better not indulged any more into this. Zarkon was still out there and any kind of distraction could end deadly. Her skin bore not just a small number of marks to prove the intent of the bellicose enemy-leader. Yet no logic could defy that irresponsible, strange sense of longing, tearing down every wall of will and reason she brought up against it.

She knew this was about who she was and that no piece of clothing would ever change the person she had made of herself, she really knew, but …

She remembered the heavy gravity of Shiro's body and the feathery caress of his thumb and felt a flush of color rushing to her cheeks almost immediately. There was the instant urge to retrace the shadow of that touch. Instead of providing to it, her hands curled to fists. "Oh quiznak," she cursed under her breath miserably, realizing once more how deeply and helplessly she had entangled herself in her own infatuation for Shiro.

One just had to look at this mess which also seemed to describe the state of… everything she thought she was. She breathed in slowly and pushed herself up from the mattress. Then Pidge cast her eyes down her own shape. This strange, new shape she still hadn't fully come to terms with. She liked the fact that she had grown – being small might had been a tactical advantage in some way, but rather impractical on a daily-life-basis.

She also had appreciated that this had allowed her to pack on a little more muscle so she would be more effective when it came to hand-to-hand combat.

Even though, it somehow hadn't mattered if she was a girl or boy and she just couldn't understand why it mattered so much to her now. Or why the general thought of dressing up nicely held something nearly preposterous, it wasn't like she hadn't done this before she had infiltrated Galaxy Garrison ground.

Unbidden, her thoughts went astray at this question, summoning the picture of Shiro and the glazed look in his eyes – a phantom of the longing she herself had kindled for their leader herself for such a long time. She wondered what he saw when he looked at her. 'Pidge', his friend and companion? 'Katie', the girl he had sworn to protect and bring back to her family? Was this how she wanted him to perceive her?

Obviously… not, she figured as her glance fell back on the chaos of pants and shirts that, in their disarray, seemed to stare back at her almost accusingly.

"This is stupid," she mumbled. She was clearly out of her mind and the air in her chamber was getting thin. Maybe a walk would clear her thoughts.

It didn't. Moving through the spacey hallways of the flying castle-ship, every doorway felt like a remainder of yesterday's event and whenever her eyes grazed her worn-out boots there was this nagging notion that she probably shouldn't wear those for the party later today.

An emotion pulsed through her chest that Pidge recognized as annoyance and her eyes narrowed – why couldn't she just return to function normally? So Shiro almost kissed her under the artificial glow of the headlights. Fine. What was the big deal? Love was a human emotion, they were both human, yes, but that didn't mean that they…

Her train of thoughts was thrown off track when her left shoulder collided with something soft and warm as she turned a corner. There was a muffled sound of surprise coming from the direction of her unexpected obstacle and while she tried to reclaim her balance, her eyes took hold of Hunk who steadied the swaying top of the ingredient tower on his arms.

"Sorry, I didn't see you," she apologized quickly, earning herself an interested yet somewhat critical glance from the Yellow Paladin. Hunk's eyes peered down his own broad stature for a second before favoring Pidge with a frown.

"You look glum. Did something happen?"

As much as she valued her friend's trait to not beat around the bush, she didn't know if she wanted to talk about things she hadn't fully come to terms with herself. "It's nothing."

"It sure doesn't look like nothing. You really don't want to talk about it? I mean, I totally respect it if you didn't want to, but if you need an ear or two..."

She should have known that he wouldn't let go that easily. Pidge's amber irides searched the passage for other members of their crew, but with nobody in sight and the empty hallway offering a relative privacy, she exploited on his offer. Of course there was his curiosity oozing from his lines, but also honest concern.

"I'm just trying to do the right thing," she caved in – her words carried by a long, troubled breath. An alarmed expression flashed across Hunk's features. "Whoa, wait; you're not going to leave us again, are you?"

"Wait, what…?" The mere idea was so unfathomable that it took her a moment to grasp it. "Why would you think that?"

"You were always so much about your family and now that you found them…" Her friend's voice trailed off as if afraid to lend any more reality to his fears.

"Oh…" Pidge said. She hadn't even thought that far. "That sure would be nice," she admitted, although Hunk's dramatic interruption made it impossible to continue.

"So you're really going to leave us. Oh no, we're all doomed."

The Green Paladin huffed audibly and shot him an irritated look. "Geez, Hunk, I'm not going anywhere." She exhaled, her agitation dwindling quickly in face of the devastating truth. Her arms came up to support themselves. "Not with Zarkon still around…"

"Oh, yeah, him…"

Hunk said no more. He didn't need to. The apprehensive quality of his silence spoke for itself and it didn't take long for Pidge to recall the event which Hunk's worries probably orbited like an unhinged satellite. She couldn't blame him. There really had been a time she willingly would have left all this behind to be reunited with her family – before this ship and prominently Team Voltron that it inhabited had become her second home – and part of her family, too. Still, this endeavor during the early days of her journey was the best proof of Zarkon's vicious intent to strike whenever the seven of them were at their weakest. And this was why she couldn't afford to…

"Hunk? Aren't you… ever afraid that the Galra found out about you and Shay and used it for their advantage?" A bright red sprung to Hunk's cheeks and he uttered a stutter of incoherent syllables. She knew that the Yellow Paladin saw the alien girl every time their travels brought them close enough to the Balmera. They never had made a public announcement or anything, but one had to be blind to not see that they had been going steady for at least a year now. "W-w-where did that come from all of a sudden?"

Throughout all uncertainties that had plagued her recently, she felt a bit of smugness return to her. "So she isn't your girlfriend then?" she teased mildly.

The crimson on the Yellow Paladin's face only amplified. "Of course she is," he replied defensively and with meaning, before he continued with an almost somberly. "And of course I'm worried about her well-being. We have been talking about this a lot actually. But if I learned one thing then it is that it shouldn't be Zarkon who defines our actions. And she is a strong girl. She can take care of herself," he said with pride shining from both voice and eyes. Then he cast a quizzical look at Pidge and a wolfish grin curled around the corners of his mouth.

"So it's a love thing, right?" he inquired, catching the Green Paladin flat-footed. If it weren't for the ingredients on his arms, Pidge was sure he would have used the finger-gun motion he had picked up from Lance at some point. "Don't you have a banquet to prepare?" Pidge mumbled while a traitorous heat unfolded below her skin. She hated that she blushed so easily. Meanwhile Hunk didn't even try to hide just how much he enjoyed it to be at the giving end for once. The look he cast at her was more than telling. But after another moment, he inclined his head to agree with her previous question. "Alright. Take care. And if they ever try to break your heart…" he winked in a very meaningful and supportive manner.

"I fear you would lose," she replied slightly bemused and with a lopsided smile before a small snicker escaped her throat at his bewildered blink. "But thank you," she continued while nodding him off gently.

As she continued pacing the hallways after bidding her friend goodbye, Pidge's thoughts wandered back to the conversation with Hunk. The longer her mind lingered on his words, the more obvious it became how their engineer wasn't the only one living on those rules. Probably even longer than Hunk and Shay were in an official relationship, Keith and Lance shared far more than just a friendly rivalry. Princes and princesses of the allied kingdoms alike were turning their heads for just a beacon of Allura's attention and interest. And Coran… well… Coran was as radiant as ever.

Everyone seemed to enjoy their own small share of happiness and now that it was Pidge's turn to be happy – reunited with her family – she had to concede that she couldn't. Not fully at least. Too strongly she recalled Shiro's haunted expression when his demons had wrested that bit of happiness from him he had been about to claim for himself. Even with all the quibbling awkwardness that had chaperoned their only meeting today, she had noticed the tension in his squared shoulders and the air of tedious responsibility clinging to all his actions. Like he still had to atone to whatever sins he thought he had committed. Like happiness was not for him. It… it just wasn't fair.

The wish to return Shiro a little of what he had given her those past years, to banish all those dark lines from his face, burned brighter than ever within her. And quickly, the furious fire ignited her whole being. As her gaze turned to one of the walls where the argent panels emulated the blurry lines of her image, she felt almost stupid for pondering that long in solitude of her room when the course of action should have been clear from the beginning. Hunk was right. Zarkon was not here, but Shiro was. And if she had the chance to make him happy, even if it was for just a fleeting moment like yesterday, she would do hell and let it pass. Time to put some sharp edges to that ambiguous, hazy picture of herself.

·

"Well then… the universe belongs to the brave ones, they say," Pidge encouraged herself, her voice a tense mumble, as she stood in the front of Allura's chamber.

There were sure a dozen other ways to distract Shiro from his worries, yes.

A few that wouldn't leave a string of nervous excitement bugging her thoughts so constantly.

But none that put such an elating feeling in her chest whenever she thought about it.

She put her hand on the outer communication panel.

"Allura? Are you there? I thought I…"

The door opened before she could complete her sentence.

"Pidge? What are you doing here? Shouldn't you getting yourself ready for the party this evening?"

Judging by the messy state of Allura's hair, the Green Paladin must have caught the Altean woman in the middle of her own preparations. Pidge rolled the words back and forth in her mouth – all of them tasted sickingly sweet and not really like herself. And she felt too nervous to play it cool.

"That's it", she said bluntly at last. "I… have nothing to dress."

A frown crinkled the princess' brow and a pair of appraising, blue irides brushed over Pidge . "What do you mean by that? You have plenty of stuff…" Allura's voice trailed off and her gaze fixed on the uneasy shoulder-roll Pidge hadn't been able to suppress – the quality of her idea appeared sillier with every second she was standing an almost predatory, knowing grin flashed across Allura's lips and the princess' eyes lit up.

"...but you want look pretty for someone," she concluded. "That's it, isn't it?" She clasped her hands with excitement."Oh, Pidge, I'm so happy. And so happy you came to me. Tell me, who is it?" Her ecstatic expression wavered for a second."It...it isn't Lance, right?"

Pidge almost recoiled physically at the question, a part of her wondering if the princess was really that oblivious. Lance was a good and loyal if sometimes a little obnoxious friend, but… no, simply, no.

Her grimace gave her thoughts away, obviously, as Allura now went for the process of elimination. "If it's not him than it is…"

"Allura, please," Pidge intervened. Although the princess' reaction was pretty much within her calculations it didn't mean, similar as with Hunk, that she was ready or prepared to talk about this kind of emotions yet. For the longest time, she hadn't allowed herself to really admit them, even though she had fallen for Shiro over and over again – knowing that once they were revealed, it would change things between them inevitably. So they still felt raw and new, too unique to give away so soon – albeit she knew she wanted things to change. Less for her, but more for Shiro.

To her relief, the princess seemed to understand, too.

"Okay, I won't pry." She reached for the Green Paladin's hand. "But I will be glad to help you. Come in."

"...no, that won't do either. You..."

Pidge had stopped counting for a while now but after what felt like the fifteenth or twentieth dress to her, Allura finally came to the same conclusion the Green Paladin had come to after dress number five.

"I look like I'm wearing a costume." Pidge finished for her. "Like with any other dress. That just isn't me."

"I fear you are right," the princess admitted with a mix of sadness and defeat – the cheerful enthusiasm she had shown at the beginning of her closet-raid had long worn down. A deeply unsatisfied expression dominated her features while she stared quite intensively at the green gown Pidge was wearing right now.

"But maybe..."Allura pressed a knuckle against her lower lip. "It could work," she mumbled to herself and Pidge couldn't help but follow her gaze.

The dress fitted nicely around her upper body but the elaborate, layered skirt part made her look like a desperate cabbage on a stick. It was one of the princess' better choices, though.

"I think I know what we do!" Allura exclaimed suddenly and her face brightened again. Pidge, contemplating whether she should ask Coran for some of his old stuff or make some of her own look a little more presentable or discard the whole plan altogether, was caught somewhat off-guard and knit her eyebrows. "You… do?" she asked, not quite following Allura's line of thought for a second as she was relocating her own.

"Yes," she replied brightly. "You know, back on Altea, I was pretty active when I was younger and would drive my tailors crazy, because I ripped the seams of every dress. Unintentionally, of course."

Actually, Pidge had no troubles believing that.

"To prevent themselves from constant repairs, they created a special, more casual design. Maybe… I can modify that dress you're wearing according to that pattern."

That again Pidge found a bit harder to believe. She knew one could easily be fooled into believing Allura's greatest weapon was her beauty when the princess held an amazing arsenal of abilities, but she wouldn't have counted dressmaking among it.

"Are you sure you can do that?"

"Well, yes, of course. And the mice sure will help me."

"That is…" In a loss for words, Pidge turned in front of the mirror screen, marveling the design once more.

Allura had done wonders to the gown. The lime-green, tight-cut bodice was still the same, but instead of that layered disaster that had swiveled around Pidge's ankles, there was now a single, triangular skirt part with a white, silver-embroidered trim reaching down from her waist to one of her knees. Where the dress fell short on the other side, strait shorts in the same design created the illusion of a second, shorter skirt while retaining maximum mobility. An unobtrusive, sterling belt and a white, long-sleeved bolero in Altean cut, edged with an argent ribbon, completed the outfit.

"…amazing, I know. I'm actually a little jealous you get to wear it and not me," Allura replied with the faintest hint self-indulgence and Pidge felt a light blush creep up to her face involuntarily. "Although, one thing is still missing," the princess added and stepped right behind Pidge, a silvery arc glinting between her hands. Carefully, she placed the shiny hair band on top of the Green Paladin's head.

"There. A pretty, young Paladin ready to claim her man."

Despite the warmth on her cheeks she frowned. "I'm… not claiming him."

Allura chuckled. "He sure wants you to when he sees you. Are you ready?"

On cue, her mind conjured a catalogue of unpleasant scenarios – what if people laughed at her? What if Shiro didn't even bat an eye at her? What if the seams burst? Or the dress turned back into a cabbage at midnight because it was an enchanted piece of Altean clothing? What if the ship fell under attack in the middle of the festivities and everyone was captured, because she couldn't get out of the dress and into her lion fast enough? What if the ship fell under attack and she was a cabbage? …wait, stop.

She took a deep, calming breath. 'If you get worried too much about what could go wrong, you might miss a chance to do something great' Shiro's voice resounded clearly in her memory, and those words – words her very own father had once spoken – had gently guided her ever since. She remembered the juvenile excitement and open joy of that day. And she was determined to return it to Shiro.

"Yes, I'm ready. Let's go."

·

She hadn't been ready at all.

As Coran had messaged their closest confides of the Alliance of Voltron within the area to see the results of their invaluable help over the years, the ball room was already filled nicely with people of all alien races and a happy tune when Pidge entered it.

Her stomach felt like she had eaten too much space goo while her legs felt … like actual space goo.

The sensation only became worse when her searching glance crossed over Shiro's muscular back, standing with the other paladins among the visitors.

While a part of her had anticipated Shiro's reaction on her attire, the greater part of her now wasn't sure if she wanted to find out. Instead of joining her companions, she scurried over to her brother and father standing near the balustrade at the other side of the stairs. Their faces lit the moment they caught sight of her. And Pidge couldn't help but smile back.

Although the time of imprisonment lent a hard line to especially Matt's jaw, with them both shaved and properly dressed, they looked much more like themselves again. Although she still had to get used to Matt's braid, taming the voluminous mess the infamous Holt-hair became when it got longer. 'There has to be a way to tell us apart, so I didn't cut it yet,' he had laughed after her eyes had stopped at the hairstyle the first time earlier today. They had joked about how he should wear dresses to confuse the heck out of the other Paladins, and it was almost ironic how much the tables had turned during the last few hours.

Exchanging hugs now, Matt cast her an appreciative nod with a wistful gleam in his eyes. "Looks my little sis isn't that little anymore. You look good," he stated. Her father, however, was a little more straight-forward and fatherly admiration shone from his features. "I can't believe my girl has grown into a beautiful, young woman." There was a weird dissonance in her heart at these words, though she couldn't exactly tell why. She felt like she had to dissuade them from this opinion, when, scientifically speaking, there was no room to argue.

"Dad, I'm still me," she replied, a light strain in her mild laugh.

"You're right, forgive me. It's just… hard to grasp just how much time has passed."

"That's true. But what matters is that you're here now," she said and meant it. These strenuous, three years hadn't always been easy, but worth every second.

"It's a little sad mom can't be with us, too," Matt added, hints of sorrow woven to his words.

"Don't worry, son, we will see her eventually." The light quiver in her father's voice was the only sign how much he missed her and he seemed intent to have the conversation drift in another direction.

"You've made quite some friends there," he said, looking down the balustrade to the other Paladins.

"The best," she replied, pride filling her chest and her eyes followed her father's glance.

They made a merry round, the four of them, and a deep contentedness unfolded in her chest. Then Hunk fell short of whatever he had meant to say and tugged on Keith's sleeve before he fixed his eyes on Pidge. All of the quartet's eyes did the same shortly thereafter and it was surprise that rendered her friends' faces. The Green Paladin could hardly judge them for that – displays of her femininity were scarce due to the constant battles and the fact that to her friends, her gender didn't matter.

What didn't stop Lance from winking at her in a quite flirtatious way now, earning the Blue Paladin a slap from Keith in return. But Pidge had only eyes for Shiro.

Even from up here she could see how his solemn expression broke apart and how he just stared blandly for a second or two, before he blinked and pulled his gaze away. Hunk elbowed him with sort of a knowing, almost smug grin, connecting the dots. The ease that had started to settle on her previously taut nerves evaporated into thin air and her heart rate increased. And Pidge was pretty sure her pulse was galloping with hyper-speed right to the next galaxy when after a short discussion and a series of nudges and friendly claps Shiro secluded himself from the group and moved into the direction of the small Holt-family-gathering.

She knew it shouldn't perplex and agitate her that much that a plan of hers worked out, as they rarely failed in the first place, but the heavy rush of hormones flooding her veins was beyond her control.

"Katie? Is something the matter?" her father's voice asked in her back. She extracted her eyes from the scene and leaned against the balustrade nonchalantly, trying to muster some calm. "Oh, just being curious. It's rare that we have so many guests at once." While Matt gave her a suspicious eye-brow raise, he said nothing, and so her father took the word once more. He let his gaze glide over the gathering one more time and shook his head lightly as he still couldn't believe it. "I think I really owe you my bottom dollar," he said. Pidge was about to reply that he should wait until he saw her inventions when her brother raised his arms and shouted "Hey, Shiro, over here!" A bright fire blazed up in her chest and burned away the sentences stuck in her throat. There was no protocol in her mind for the moment to come and it scared her a little. It was just Shiro, she reminded herself, but at the same time so much more.

And then Shiro had closed the last distance between them. He exchanged pleasantries with her father and brother, before his focus shifted to her.

"Good to see you, too, Pidge," he greeted her, yet it was not more than an empty word as he looked everywhere but at her, scratching the back of his head.

"This looks… really nice on you."

"Th-thank you," she mustered and suddenly felt naked before his eyes, like he could see right through the shell of her body and down into the deepest desires of her heart. Her system was overheating, urging her to abort the mission, to retreat into safety to prevent a forceful shutdown, but her feet were glued to the ground and her inside a garbled mess. Shiro stood there awkwardly for some more moments until Matt apparently couldn't watch the misery any longer."Shiro, if you want to ask her for a dance you just should do so."

Shiro stiffened and then glanced around subtly as if there was somebody else going by the same name. "I wouldn't…" He started, before some sort of training instinct seemed to kick in. "Only if Pi…Ka… only if you want to," he addressed Pidge directly.

"Sure," she replied, cringing inwardly and wondering if she could sound any dumper, but this was all her empty skull could produce as her brain still lay in sweltering remains. She felt pretty stupid right now; it wasn't like her to be overrun and outsmarted like this and Matt's a-little-too-pleased grin didn't help to alleviate that notion either. Like she was stuck in some young adult fiction where everybody had conspired to set up the oblivious protagonists. With the fine difference that neither she nor Shiro were oblivious. She knew what she wanted and though unreadable, she found Shiro's eyes constantly drawn back to her. Still, she couldn't deny the excitement when he took her hand and they made their way down the stairs.

They took their place between the few pairs circling across the floor in the middle of the room.

"I'm not really an expert at this," Shiro admitted when he took her hands.

"Me neither. But we should probably get started before Lance gets the idea to show us some 'moves'."

They both glanced at the Blue Paladin who desperately tried to get his point across from afar and Shiro's stifled laugh broke a bit of the tension between them. "I think he already does," he said with a hint of resignation in his voice.

"This is all so cliché," she confessed, but then continued with a tiny smile. "But I think I like it." There was the smallest hint of shy embarrassment on Shiro's face. "Well then, slow and steady…" he said and on his nod they started dancing.

Although their motions were far from certain and rather wooden at first, Pidge almost instantly found herself drawn back into the gentle heat of Shiro's body. Less consuming than yesterday, her rigid muscles easily relented to the sensation and she trusted herself to the strength of Shiro's arms entirely. Nonetheless, missteps would obstruct their dance ever so often; but taking them with humor and smiles, they soon found a rhythm as they swayed forth and back across the floor.

She felt weightless when he twirled her around her own axis and as he pulled her closer again, the careful distance he had kept had melted away a little. Her heart seemed to rest directly below her skin, sending small quivers over it with every powerful beat and she was well aware of the flush spreading across her face.

There was starlight in his eyes when he looked at her like she was the sun and his unguarded smile stole her breath away. She wanted this moment to last forever, preserve this serene expression on Shiro's face until the end of time.

The world thwarted from her awareness until it held only the two of them, the carpet of the night-sky at their feet. And dancing in the dark, their stars realigned.

The energy between them shifted and there was a new character in the artless grace of Shiro's untrained movements.

With each rotation, he would allow her to draw closer and every time she spun away, he would lead her back with a sense of longing she hadn't known of him before. She was lost in his universe, floating on an endless emotion, and at the same time she was earthed by the warm grey of Shiro's irides. There was love shining from them whenever she looked up, and she felt safe in his arms; so close to his chest. Safe and… at home.

And even though she knew this song and their dance would end eventually, she also could say with certainty that this feeling wouldn't. They stood at the beginning of something new and she was ready to embrace it with all its wonders.

At last, their movements stopped along with the music and for a moment they just stood there, looking at each other contently, until Shiro craned his neck. "Keith, Hunk, Lance, Allura, and yes, Coran, you too – I know you are behind that pillars, stop staring."

There was rueful and disappointed commotion from behind their friends' cover and Pidge wondered if she should also call out her father and brother on the gallery from whom she was sure they watched them like the scientific discovery of the century, but decided against it.

"Let's go for a walk, shall we?" he asked and Pidge willfully agreed, welcoming a little privacy.

They eased their way to one of the hallways, leaving the parties chatter and curious eyes behind them. They walked in silence for a while, hands linked without pressure. Then Shiro cast his eyes to the ceiling above.

·

"…you surprised me today," he said.

"I made it pretty obvious, eh?" the Green Paladin replied, although she also could just as well have agreed that she had surprised even herself with this course of action. The power of her determination must be a terrific thing to outsiders, she realized. The corners of his mouth quirked upwards, and he had that certain whimsical spark in his eyes that made her heart beat faster. "Pretty much." But then the lines on his face hardened.

"I'm sorry for what happened yesterday. I shouldn't have left you…"

She squeezed his palm lightly, causing him to fall silent, before she shook her head to imply that he shouldn't patronize himself for this any longer. If anything, this action has strengthened her resolve. Allowed her to see beyond the boundaries she had set for herself. She glanced down. "… so, how long?"

Color rose to Shiro's cheeks, a pale, rosy red. "Too long."

She smiled. Maybe they were actually like the oblivious protagonists from a teenage romance novel after all. But for today, she didn't care. "Same."

Her eyes fell down to their linked hands. She wondered where they would go from here, what those admissions would ultimately mean for them. "…and now?"

There was a short silence until Shiro decided to speak up.

"You'll have to add a new weakness to that dossier you keep of me."

And the moment was gone. She pulled her fingers from Shiro's clasp with a grimace, conjuring a confused 'What?' from the young man.

"I can't believe you just said that." She shuddered, making a disgusted sound. This pick-up line could have come straight out of the mouth of someone else she knew. "For a second I thought Lance was standing next to me."

Shiro blinked and a guilty expression flashed across his features. "Sorry. I'm really not good at this. Matt has been picking on me for this ever since our garrison times," he admitted. Suddenly, the not-so-subtle nudge from her brother made a lot more sense to Pidge.

"Should we go back to consult him?" she couldn't help but to ask in an almost teasing manner, watching the shade of Shiro's flush darken. A weird sense of satisfaction flooded her to see him flustered; that she could put him in that state so easily. It was strange, she thought. Two days ago she would have forbidden herself to even let her thoughts stray to fantasize about a possible future with Shiro and now she stood right at the edge of it.

"You are just like him, great," he mumbled under this breath, barley loud enough for Pidge to catch the sense of the words, before his shoulders sagged and he drew a slow breath. "But…," he began to speak, allowing himself a small pause to carefully pick words, but as the silence stretched and none came, Pidge knew by the tensing lines of his face that some troublesome thoughts had started to creep back in his consciousness. And all at once Pidge knew what she had to say.

"If you get worried too much about what could go wrong, you might miss a chance to do something great." His eyes searched hers and surprise reflected in the grey color before they grew tender. "This really stuck with you, didn't it?" he said and the Green Paladin decided she loved that warm, content glow on Shiro's face. It suited him. She nodded.

He pulled her closer, and his next words came as a promise. A hopeful, strong and honest promise that was all she needed. "Then let's be great. Together."


End file.
